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i always think about painting my nails because i aspire to be a “”“professional”“” “”“adult”“” “”“person”“” who is “”“polished and put together”“” and “”“in control of her life”“” but then i remember that i am none of those things and also it smells bad and i can’t paint nails to save a life and it chips as soon as i wash my hair and i’m like nvm back to the bin

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anyway i’m probably going to post more about dumb stuff like this because accountability?? a semblance of community and support?? idk i’m tired and bad at words and life but i might like write things about having a brain and a body. idk

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god why am i awake. know what time i woke up yesterday? 7 pm. and now i am going to sleep, at 9 in the morning, i have a class at 4:30 and also a paper thing to write a final draft of, like, i don’t know how to not be a disaster at life with a graveyard shift sleeping schedule, and i want to live my life in the normal time frame of a functioning human being but it’s so so hard, or maybe i just make it that way, anyway my neck hurts and i need sleep but also i need to be awake probably and like, ugh, hard hard hard everything is hard and i want to sleep for 78 hours and wake up in washington dc with an actual work ethic, hahahaha

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i love raul esparza and i want to watch all of his tv shows but they are so scary and intense but i want to see his face every week

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fatandnerdy:

living for this polish 💖💕

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